What the fuck 2020?
We’ve been hating on 2020 all year long because out of any other year this decade, she was the most coercive catalyst for introspection, well in my opinion at least. We’ve already crept into mid-October with oil tails tucked between our legs, but on somedays, emotionally; I’m still in March trying process what the fuck just happened?
Alas, perhaps we’ve all just lost our fucking minds. Is it just me or do you too feel like it’s a bit too wild to be real life? I’m waiting for Ashton Kutcher’s fine ass to jump out of the bushes and tell me I’m fucking being punked right now.
Am I saying the word FUCKING too much? I write what I like!
2020 is my first time single in 8 years
I’m beginning to think I enjoy single me. Relationship me was such a PICK ME. I kid you not. I found solace in this lockdown period; I didn’t have to show my embarrassed face out here in these Johannesburg streets. I don’t even know if I like relationship me. We’ll delve deeper into my reasoning in another blog post. Also, I hope Cardi B isn’t back with you Offset.
Accumulatively, I jam-packed two four-year-long, mediocre ass relationships back-to-back. I spent the first four years with a very meek momma’s boy; and the other four years with a pretty devil operating from his feminine; who hates his mother. That sounds like a perfect YouTube storytime. But yeah, I’m wiser now, you’ll know it. I’m also single and celibate and have not had an orgasm (intentionally) since February, this year. Do you think if I climaxed I’d reset the world? JK That’s also another blogpost honey. The content is boundless at this stage because I’ve learnt so much. I owed it to myself to transform and spend some time as a single woman, coming into her divine femininity.
Klink Klink to new beginnings
I logged onto my blog to post something one day, a few months ago. To my surprise, all of my posts were gone. I’ll blame my vindictive ex-fiance because I know him well enough, even with no proof. I felt a sharp sadness inside of my chest. I’d lost so much hard work. Stories about my life that I’d shared with the readers of my blog. To have that taken away from me was cruel.
I don’t want to speculate as to why he would’ve done such a fucked up thing because men are always trying to inconvenience us, but I finally built the strength to begin again and be my most authentic self this time around. I intend to be sharing more frequently about my experiences in past relationships, addressing my traumas, learning to set boundaries and being a single mother.
We have just a few months left of the year; I implore you to be your most authentic selves. Living a facade just wasn’t as fulfilling as it looked on my Instagram account. I’m happy for the opportunity to begin again. Dreams aren’t just for “them” or for the new year. So here’s a gentle reminder that YOU ARE THAT BITCH, and bitch being genderless! Set intentions in motion, be kinder to yourself and others and practice your manifesting power by playing an active role in the destiny of your life.
Thanks for reading post 1.